Broomsticks & BMX Tricks
by typicalRAinbow
Summary: "Holy Macaroni!" Charlie's spending his half term at Cackles and, much to HB's irritation and confusion, is once more getting far too attached at the idea of becoming a witch.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi! Hope everyone's alright, I own nothing, here's hoping I actually finish something and big thank you to PrincessSammi for idea bouncing and muse kicking. Enjoy.**

Charlie Blossom's first real encounter with a Witch had not been a pleasant one.

Of course being eight years old and three quarters at the time, he didn't really know about witches except from the bad ones in stories like the one with a gingerbread house and ate little boys and Charlie was sure he'd never get eaten because he didn't like gingerbread. He knew his uncle worked at a school for witches but Charlie didn't really believe him. it was a girls school for smelly girls and Charlie only liked hearing about the frogs in the pond and the ghost in the roof.

Witches were just old Halloween hags with warty noses on broomsticks against the full moon. It'd never occurred to him that witches could ride a bicycle in broad daylight if they wanted too. Or that a witch be quite fast for her age and have hairy knees, although that one was more an afterthought.

She'd been very angry, understandably, being knocked off her old bike by a plastic football to the noggin. If Charlie and his little gang of friends had run to her aid rather than running away in different directions, red sparks might have not fired from her hands and zeroed in for smacking bottoms like a swarm of glow in the dark wasps with cheek targeting.

But young ones don't think like that. Respecting your elders is not being cheeky to granddad, any warnings of incoming objects they'd kicked to hard is a cry of "HEADS" and an angry adult is one to avoid at all costs. It hadn't occurred to him and his friends this angry adult might be a witch till it was a tad too late.

And while on the plus side the witch hadn't tried to eat him or turn him into a toad, eight and three quarter year olds have a habit of only focusing on the bad things; his dad hadn't been too pleased when his friends mums all came round complaining Charlie had gotten their little darlings jinxed cursed or boiled. He'd locked Charlie's own bike in the garage as punishment although it didn't really work as a punishment as the hairy kneed witch had tanned his hide completely so he could barely sit on the settee let alone a saddle. It took nearly three weeks for the boils to fade. It might have been even longer if his uncle hadn't brought back a 'magic potion' back from work on the third weekend after the incident.

It has also never occurred to him that he'd actually learn something from the experience. Quite useful somethings. One, uncle frank always tells the truth. Two, hebal Boil cures might turn you eyebrows ginger. And most impotently of all Three, never ever ever angry a real witch.

Oh Charlie learnt his lesson alright. But everyone has those moments when everything they've learnt goes out their heads…Even witches. Real Witches.

**If I ever do finish this I warn you now it'll get Nauseatingly sweet towards the end.**


	2. Chapter 2

Four birthdays later and the fifth is in the process of being planned, providing it meets approval of his uncles employer. Well more her deputy's approval, which as any witch will tell you is extremely hard to gain, especially during Thursday lunch break.

"That boy will be Here?" Constance Hardbroom said, aghast at the latest titbit of news Amelia had told her staff.

"Yes-"

"For a week?" Amelia couldn't help noticing every word at the end of each sentence going up an extra octavie.

"Well plus the weekend before and then he'll head home on the Monday morning." Miss Cackle nodded gesturing to the abandoned correspondence letter. "So a week and an a bit technically."

"Oh it gets better. And during the girls school hours!" Miss Hardbroom snapped "Why?"

"Do you mean why is Charlie choosing to spend time with his uncle and friends the week before his birthday while his mother and father are away having booked a much deservered break not realising that Camelot's half terms are staggered between the year groups until it was too late to do anything or why given the favour we owe Ted I gave permission for Charlie to stay?"

That momentarily put her deputy in her place and she sat backdown being unused to being spoken to like that and Amelia used the silence to sneak a much needed slurp of tea. Drill and Bat exchanged relived looks; One could get a crick in the neck watching the arguments tennis back and forth between Constance and someone else for a change a change. This staff meeting had not gone well and Charlie's stopover wasn't even supposed to have been an item of main concern.

"I think you're far too hard on the boy Constance, Charlie is such a sweet little thing-"

"He isn't."

"He is too-" Miss Bat sniffed, stirring more questionable pink stuff into her tea. "Anyone would think he was a ventdeeta agaisnt them."

"Maybe Mildred Hubble has competition." Drill said with a smirk. This very nearly earned her a swift kick under table, only Imogen never seemed to sit 'properly' on any chair and the unfortunate witch ended up booting the chair leg. If she'd stubbed her toe she covered it well.

"He'll be here for a ten days- or eight and two halves if you're going to be particular." Amelia stated, using the voice that not even HB would interrupt. "Charlie's allowed to study along side the girls when he wants too or stay out of the way while they are in lessons, I don't mind and neither does his mother providing he behaves and gets his homework done. On his birthday, Frank and I will be taking him to Cosies-"

This wasn't so much an interruption but a shared but secret and barely audible titter from the other staff at Amelia's eagerness to volunteer for such a mission.

"Along any his friends of his choosing providing they have permission although depending who he picks I'm afraid your volleyball team might be one or two short for pratice-"

Again not an interruption as such; Miss Drill nodded but muttered something akin to sarcasm and two witches clashed boots under the table both aiming for a shin and both hitting a chair leg. Amelia was an expert at turning a blind eye when telling offs weren't necessary and simply gave her staff the look. Scowls between the three of them where fine, if it got to the point again when someone's chair started levitating or vanished entirely then she'd step in.

"As I was saying, Charlie may invite any of his friends but within reasonable numbers and they've to have my permission- a clean slate for the week I think is fair-"

"Well that's mildred Hubble out of the- OWCH!"

"Don't be rude- Hey!"

"Well she has a point-What was that for?!"

"Who's she, the cat's mother?"

"Only if it's a Hell Cat!"

"Ladies-" Miss Cackle asked, code for Imogen don't curse, Davina put your baton down and Constance, don't even think about it. "It's not a party so won't get out of hand and it won't disturb any of your lessons or eat in to their revision time- I'm sure it'll give Charlie and his friends an extra incentive to study and behave."

There was a sudden hiss pain and the unmistakable sound of leather boots on running trainers.

"I hope…"


	3. Chapter 3

**I ought to mention, this story is a bit wibbly wobbly timey wimey. I started it basing it first year but some storyline relys on things from second and third series like Charlie being at Camelots and other things so I'll iron out the kinks. Also I've made a slight tweak to the Blossoms and Mrs Tapioca's history/bloodline. But those will crop up later. I still own nothing. Meanwhile thank you to BellatrixKelly98 242megxxx ImpossiblePoet and Princess Sammi for reviewing :)**

** Oh look a double chapter. Hope you enjoy :)**

"Turn up would you I can't hear it."

"If you shut up you might be able to."

"This is stupid."

"You're stupid. Why's it breaking up?"

"How should I ruddy know?" Coldstone huffed. she threw in a few red leaves into the mix and thumped the side of the cauldron a few times, but it only made the fire underneath crackle even louder and static magic danced over in the pot like snow, blurring the little black and white image of the staffroom where the good twin sat with the other teachers unaware of her sister's cronies had spying on her.

"Here- stop fiddling with it." Bindweed complained. Too late, the cauldron boiled over with a PUT.

"Oh well done you great nit! Change it back quick-"

"Can't, its gone dead. Meetings probably finished anyway if Batty's allowed to start eating the daffodils in the vase." her companion grumbled, unhooking the now useless pot from the tripod and swapping it for a kettle putting a proper brew on. "What a waste of time. We'd had more luck with your telescope."

"It worked fine till someone thought we saw a peeping tom. Don't know why we bother anyway. The only bits we picked up were boring and school related. Always is." They back on their log contemplating what to do.

"We could go to the pub." Coldstone shrugged. "They have free pool in the afternoons."

"No we can't. What did I tell you?"

"They're lying when they say anything's free, you gotta be drinking. They're fine with taking money don't mean they like us."

"Right. And we ain't gots no money 'cos Agatha ain't paid us. Again. And while we're at it whys Agatha get outta this? It's her idea."

"My ears are burning, what are you two planning?" Came a sudden squawk from above.

"Speak of witch." Coldstone muttered and called up to the not so esteemed leaded as she descended into the clearing. "We was planning going to the Cat an'Moon to play pool-"

"And using a convince that ain't the public loos or a bush." Betty joined in. "Where'd you go anyway?"

"Never you mind." Agatha snapped, propping up her broomstick with the other two, wanting to get off the subject of toilets. "You weren't supposed to planning pub crawls you were supposed to be spying. What did you find out?"

The two crones shrugged and relayed what little they'd learnt and were surprised how interested Agatha was about the upcoming visit by the Blossom boy, asking for dates and times and pacing about deep in thought. They let her get on with it and Bindweed poured out the nettle tea only to nearly spill it when Agatha suddenly had a very loud idea.

"Kidnapping! We catch him and we barter with him to get the school!"

"We tried that!" Coldstone all but wailed (though that might have been the scolding liquid sweeping though her rags. "But we never get past the kidnapping bit and we can't use magic against the oath. Last time we went after Drill, the brats were right behind her and we were outnumbered."

"Beaten by another bunch of first years. It's embarrassing." Bindweed grumbled. "And I had a blooming headache for ages after we tried sneaking in the back way. What kind of half breed carries a frying pan around in her pocket? And we nearly get run over nearly every time we tried to grab Mr Frank-"

"I told you to wait till he'd stopped his motorbike." Agatha snapped, "And I ain't talking about the Old caretaker. I mean the kid, that nephew of his. Think about, we now know rest of staff even the non-magical; they're protected by oath and thus the code. But this boy, he's not part of the school is he?"

"No."

"And is he or is he not a wizard in training at Camerots?"

"He is."

"So...?"

"Sooo…erm-" the crones thunked. "He's a little wizard?"

"So he's not protected by oath protecting the school AND we can use magic against him without hitting us three fold!" Agatha screeched. "Do I have to do all the thinking around here? That stupid sister of mines let him do as he likes so if we get him on his own and BAM! We catch him and work trade which they're bond to they're fond of him-"

"HB ain't."

"She ain't keen on Hubble," Agatha stopped and spat on the floor in disgust, as though to rid the taste of Mildred's name from her mouth. "Hardbroom doesn't have to like any of them snotty spoilt brats. She's a teacher and as a goodie-goodie two shoes with morals she'll have no choice but to go along with our demands. Now are you with me or not?"

They had to admit it was a good plan. Well better than Agatha's normal plans. "Good. Now here's what we do," Agatha started in hushed and evil tones…

Before she was interrupted by a football to the head that knocked off her hat and glasses. In retrospect setting up 'camp' on the edge of the woods overlooking the village green was a bit of a mistake but house or B&B prices in the village where ridiculous and it was the nearest the little coven dared to pitch up near the academy without alerting the other Cackle twin and co of their presence.  
Bindweed and Coldstone dived for cover as Agatha lost her temper as fired two three useless spells blindly before she found her glasses, knocking over stacks of firewood and bottles. There was a targeted flash far the ball burst and deflated with the unpleasant sound of a wet fart.

"You shouldn't have done that." Coldstone muttered.

"Why?" Agatha huffed readjusting her hat and cloak the realised there was someone new in the area. A little face with a mop of blonde hair no older than seven peeked out from behind a tree, eyeing up the three old crones with wide eyes having seen the quite nasty demise of the football it'd come to retrieve. Agatha put on her nicest smile and sweetest voice. "Oh I am sorry, Hello there little…er… boy-?"  
It was funny how Amelia Cackle was naturally nice but Agatha's forced attempt made her look like viscous man-eating walnut that hadn't eaten in a week and the withes caught a glimpse of a red jumper as the child ran off screaming; "MAM! MAM THOSE WERILD BAD WITCHES ARE IN THE WOODS AGAIN!"

"Troll bogies! Right Broom it, quick hide scatter!" Agatha ordered hysterically. "Last thing we need is the local bobby sticking us in the nick again!"

"Sod this." Coldstone huffed to herself as they rushed to pack everything away. "Why don't we just go on holiday for a while and come back when that oath wears off?"


	4. Chapter 4

"We see far too much of that boy as it is."

"It's only for a week for goodness sake."

"He's barely ever here."

"Anyway ladies we've not finished yet." Amelia started; unaware of the surveillance two bad witches were carrying out on her meeting or palaver her sister was minutes away from. "We've still to sort the rotas for this fortnight and there is another item up for discussion."

"Another?" Miss Hardbroom asked, innocently ignoring Miss Drill's glare as the blonde massaged her trodden on foot. "If it's about Mildred's latest disaster, the paperwork is on your desk headmistress."

"Ah no, thank you for reminding me Constance but I'm sure we're already aware of that item."

"I wasn't. What happened?"

"Miss Bat left Mildred and her little friends unattended in the yard-"

"I only turned my back for a minute I swear."

"This is why the passage steps appear to be made out of rubber and why two first years were checked over in the sick bay. But we can gossip about that later. What I'm more concerned about," Amelia sighed putting on her glasses and pulling another opened letter from the stack on the table. "Is that the on the same week Charlie's here, Wizard Rowan Webb will be visiting us again."

This caused both an uneasy and amused ripples through the small meeting. Not quite the dramatic reaction if it had been the Chief Wizard but certain teacups where certainly lowered amongst the nods and half smiles. As kind hearted as Algernon was and as fond as they were of the once frog wizard, he could also be very excitable, over jolly and even a pain in the neck at times.

"Oh and young Merlin Longstaff too." Amelia said, skimming the letter for details before passing the letter around for her colleges to read. "Don't worry, we've have Algemon's written word that this time he won't not be so- oh what's was it?"

"Daft?"

"Ridiculous?"

"Fun?" This earned Davina the look from all three members of staff which very nearly sent her off to the cupboard.

"No. where was I?"

"We've have his written word that…"

"Aah thank you we've have Algemon's written word he won't be so foolish. No snowstorms or upside down days this time he promises."

"But even then we'll still in the middle of revising for the exams." Constance complained, practically snatching the sheet of paper. "One young boy running about the castle is quite enough isn't it? Why add another and a likeminded wizard to the mix?"

"Rowan-Webb will in the area mostly on business," Miss Cackle said reassuringly. "He'll heading to Camelot college, to visit the other wizards and to have Merlin's apprentice coursework marked and tested before the boy goes back to school for another term." Miss Cackle smiled and Drill was secretly glad not to be the only one baffled by the wizards' way of doing things given Bat's roll of the eyes and loud tsk mirrored HB's. "Both of them would like to pop by for a visit anyway but Algernon's also asked if we could perhaps have Merlin for a few nights. Give him a bit of a holiday I suppose-"

"Hardly a holiday." Constance tutted. Imogen agreed. Amelia did a double take.

"Merlin works at riverside; it's practically a live in holiday."

"But it saves him going back to his own school so early or staying at the house on his own." Davina pointed out. "Poor boy has nowhere else to go really."

Miss Cackle nodded. "Same reason I've allowed Charlie to stay really. I don't want him staying unsupervised in empty house or spending holidays in school."

"Well why doesn't Charlie blossom stay at Camelot's and have free reign there? Along with Merlin?" Constance started (neither an empty house nor holidays studying had never ever done _her_ any harm) but Imogen interrupted.

"Camelot's terms are staggered between the years groups aren't they?"

"That's right. But I don't quite see what you're getting at."

"Can we save explaining of magical practice for another meeting, I've a detention to supervise."

"So the year above will be in Camelot's when Charlie's on his half term? I mean that will Hellebore's apprentices will be at Camelot that week?" Imogen persisted. "Our alternative is to let Merlin and possibly Charlie Blossom spend half term with Barry and Gareth? Heliboring's bully boys?"

Again Constance was put in her place unexpectedly. For a rare moment the staff room was silent in sour contemplation. 'Baz' Dragonsbane and 'Gaz' Grailquest where bad eggs and even more bad news. Not one of the witches in that room could stand the pair and rightly so. following the fiascos of their run ins with the girls- not just the debate they cheated in, the upside down day pranks, the cosy food fight and the time they nearly tore Mildred arms from their sockets fighting over her- but the rude comments, the smarminess and simply the bad taste one got in their mouths just dealing with them and it was common knowledge that first 'Loopy lugs' then 'blossom buddy' were favourite targets for practicing on.

"That's defiantly not a holiday of any sort."

"Why they haven't been excluded yet…"

"Right, that settles it then," Amelia said gruffly, boding no arguments. "Charlie AND Merlin will be staying with us. For the sake of them having a halfway decent holiday here."

Constance wasn't so cruel as to disagree now. She might dislike Charlie but she liked Baz'n'Gaz even less. However she still had some concerns. "But what are we to do with them? We don't have boys here."

"Same as any other pupil. And Charlie's very keen on broomstick flying. Spells, potions chanting-"

"Snigs and snails!" Davina giggled. "I'm sure I can find some chants but young boys, they can be ever so shy about singing espesilly in front of girls."

"Will they have sports kit with them?"

"If they won't chant I can't see Charlie playing netball, Imogen."

"Sports are for every one regardless of gender!"

"I mean," Constance continued ignoring the spat (Imogen moved her feet just in case!) "Is won't they be a distraction for our girls? We've found before putting the sexes together causes nothing but trouble especially with Mildred and her friends are concerned. They'll hang around the girls being far too much of a distraction."

"Or too the other end of the scale they go off by themselves?" Amelia shrugged. "I can't see them wanting to spend ALL their time around the girls. Maybe we can send them off to do their dragon taming homework or transformation practice? I'm sure they'll be able to entertain themselves here and there."

"Neither of them seem to have many friends at Camelot." Davina agreed. She plucked a daffodil from the vase and nibbled it sadly. "It'll do them good and to see the girls again."

"Good. Then we're agreed. Charlie will spend his half term here as promised and merlin can join him a few days later." Amelia smiled. Constance actually disagreed but said nothing just rolled her eyes in distain as she packed away her things. The boy brought nothing but trouble and it would all end in tears.

"Now if don't you mind, I'll call the meeting to a close. And Constance if you could, tell Frank to make sure we've enough food in stock for pupils, cats and not just one but possibly two growing boys, thank you."


End file.
